The Puzzle Incident

You lay all the pieces out in front of you, and start piecing them together. 

One by one, a picture begins to fall into place. 

Every now and then, you run across a piece that you know is special. You can tell by the colors and the edges that it's going to be a turning point whenever you figure out where it fits. 

Sometimes you try cramming a piece in the wrong place, and need to walk away when you're frustrated that you can't make it fit. Losing a few puzzle pieces will ruin the entire project, but not realizing you've lost them makes it even worse.

Two weeks ago today, our whirlwind trip across country for JDRF Children's Congress and Friends For Life 2013 was coming to an end. It had been the experience of a lifetime, and I was excited to get home so I could dig through the pictures, and tell you guys all about it.

Somewhere between picking Sugar up from the Tween Social, and regrouping with pals at the pool, a table leg broke, and my puzzle slid into pieces on the floor in front of me. I won't go into details here, but you should know that my fallen puzzle experience was incredibly traumatizing. I wanted to sweep all the pieces back into the box and throw the entire thing away, because figuring out how to put everything back together felt too overwhelming.

It's taken a couple weeks to regain my footing. I've recovered much of my puzzle in that time, and realized the crash wasn't as detrimental as I first thought it would be. Instead of shattering into a million pieces, my puzzle fell in chunks. The majority has been pieced back into place, but the table leg is going to need some work. Going forward, I may refer to "The Puzzle Incident" from time to time, and thought I should vaguely mention it to add a little context.

So there you have it: The-Vague-Fallen-Puzzle-Incident-That-I-Do-Not-Feel-Like-Talking-About-And-I-Do-Not-Know-When-Or-If-I-Ever-Will  ...aka...  "The Puzzle Incident".

On the bright side, I think I'm ready to start blogging more about our awesome trip.

This is progress!

PS...Special thanks to my pals Tracy, Kris, and Heidi for dividing and conquering our Rosebuds while Mr. Rose and I enjoyed an amazing overnight date. We went to Scottsdale where we stayed in this super cute retro boutique hotel. We had a fantastic dinner at Fogo de Chao, and then decided to get a couple tattoos. (Betchya didn't know I'm wild like that, eh?!?!) 

Here's some pictures from our super fab night on the town...

Love.

At dinner, the bread basket was GF! (Made with yucca root flour.)

Thought provoking walls around every turn.

As a helicopter mechanic, Mr. Rose can't wear his wedding band to work. Problem solved!

My turn.

Life is a puzzle. Find your missing piece. -- Wendy Rose

Identity Crisis

Reyna's thoughts on how her nursing career has changed in recent years, really hit home.  I graduated from nursing school in 1995.

I've struggled with my own nursing career ever since the big D moved in. I used to be a strong, confident nurse at the bedside.  After D came along.....my brain turned to mush.  I was still able to go through the motions, but it felt like I just couldn't focus as intently anymore.  Maybe it was just the sleepless nights?  The realization of how fragile life is?  The constant worry?

I don't know.

Childcare was an issue.  Mr. Rose works 10 hour days, plus an hour commute each way. Bedside nursing in our area offers 12 hour shifts exclusively, plus at least a 45 minute commute each way.  Do the math however you want.  There's a law that kids can't be in childcare longer than 10 hours a day...there's just no way we could both work outside the home, in our respective careers, AND have time together on the weekends (which is important to us, because going to church together is a top priority for this family.)

Let alone the expense of childcare for 3 children.
Or Diabetes.
Or Celiac.

Something had to give.

I didn't want to stop working altogether and risk having my nursing license become inactive.  As a Helicopter Mechanic for the state, Mr. Rose is our primary provider....his job provides our bread and butter -- and...health insurance.

Ugh.

Can I be completely candid here?  I never wanted to be a full-time SAHM.  I love my kids.  I love my husband.  I love my family.  But I chose a profession that would allow me the flexibility of working outside the home 3 days week.  I felt like it would be the ideal balance.  Go to work 3 days a week (for 12 hour shifts -- these days, I'd prefer 8 hour shifts, but that's impossible to find in my area) and be home for 4 days.

I guess it all sounded fine and dandy...until life got in the way.

So I work from home.  Yes.  As a R.N.  I work 3 evenings a week, answering after hour calls for pediatric practices all over the state.  The pay is horrible compared to industry standard, but I don't have to commute.  It's nice being able to kiss my girls goodnight between calls and to wear my PJ's to work.  Just recently the girls and I spent half our summer with my mom in Montana and I was able to work from there.

For a long time, I kept plotting how I was going to get out of the office and back to the bedside.  Honestly, I have to admit that, sometimes, I'd only put half my heart into the job.  I hated the feeling that I was losing more and more of myself every day.  I was meant to be a bedside nurse.  I've wrestled with this.  Feeling out of place.  Feeling as if all that hard work to get my education and build a foundation to my career has been tossed to the wind.

But ya know what?

In reality, my assessment skills have sharpened significantly.  It's much easier to assess a patient when you can lay eyes on them....I'm learning to listen for key phrases, pay attention to background noise, and focus on specific symptoms.  I've learned how to describe symptoms of trouble in a way that helps me convey my message efficiently.  I am able to stay calm when communicating with worried parents, advocate for children on a larger scale, and encourage people to follow their parental instincts (which, by the way, I believe is a very powerful tool) .  I've talked with parents who have lost health insurance and don't know how to help their sick children.  I've listened to mothers cry because they don't know what else to do in the middle of the night.  I've assisted new mothers with breastfeeding when they feel like giving up. 

And, yes, I've taken a (more than) fair share of ridiculous calls in the middle of the night.  But I took care of ridiculous ER patients too, so whatever....

Yeah.  I'm just a R.N. who talks on the phone.

This scenario works for us right now.  As the days pass, I'm realizing more and more what a blessing this position has been for our family.  While I resented it before, I'm learning that it's exactly what we need right now.

Of course God knew all this 3 or 4 years ago when He dropped it in my lap just before Tink was due.  I've argued with Him about this plan quite a bit.  It's not what **I** wanted to be doing.  I wanted my scrubs back....my stethoscope....my very own Pyxis access code....

He wins.

You know what?  Bedside nursing will always be there.

Who knows what will be around the next corner for this R.N.

The Induction

It just kind of snuck up on me, ya know?

It was a normal Thursday afternoon.  I didn't expect anything unusual.  I work on Thursday evenings, so Thursdays tend to be slow paced around here.  I don't schedule much -- in fact, if anything, I try to take a little nap and come up with an easy dinner (you know...cereal, oatmeal, pancakes -- or tacos, like tonight).  The girls generally have a quiet day after school (HA HA HA HA!!!), often just hanging out in their rooms or watching a movie....with a few little arguments thrown into the mix. 

Well, Sugar has been asking to play with a new classmate off and on for a couple weeks.  Today I was finally able to cross paths with her mom at pick up, and it turned out that this afternoon would work for everyone.  This other little girl had a couple other friends coming to play which meant Sugar would get to hang out with a gaggle of pals!

I shuffled the two extra kiddos I usually pick up home to their abode, followed by my 3 girls who were all talking at once trying to tell me about their day.  I can't say that I was paying attention as my brain had already moved to the next step...preparing Sugar for a playdate at a new friend's house -- WITHOUT ME THERE.   I promised myself that I'd regroup and ask each of them individually about their days once I jumped the hurdle in front of me.

Once home, we checked her blood sugar (147, after a cupcake at school 2 hours earlier, thankyouverymuch), made sure the bag was stocked, and ran through a few scenarios: 

"What will you do if your blood sugar is less than 100?"  
"What will you do if your blood sugar is over 300?"  
"Recite our phone number."  

**RING RING**

We got the phone call, I wrote down directions, and then....you know....mentioned that Sugar has diabetes.

Because you can just throw something like that into a conversation, right?

Forget the fact that we've been playing this game for 5 years and *I* still don't understand all the rules.  Or the fact that Sugar is only 7.  Or the fact that this little drop is such a powerful thing.  Or the fact that she has celiac on top of it.  I mean....it's all arbitrary, right?

Worried that I'd scare my new mom friend away, I quickly followed with an explanation that Sugar can check her own sugar, knows how to operate her insulin pump, should keep her bag in a safe place, will bring along her own gluten free snack, and knows to call me for any reason at all.

With that, we packed up and headed over.

It just happened so fast.  I tried to focus on how well she did the other night with a new babysitter.  I tried to tell myself that she can do this -- and I'll only be 2 minutes away --and it's just going to be okay....

About 20 minutes later, the phone rang.

**EEK** PANIC -- RUN -- JUMP OVER THE DOG -- FLY TO THE PHONE!!!!!!

"Mom, we're going to go swimming."

Ummmm...say again?

Let's pause for a moment here.  Seriously.  Go find the D Mama nearest to you 

and mention these three words:

"SWIMMING.  BOUNCE HOUSE."

Watch what happens.  I guarantee you'll get the same universal response. Those words will send shivers down a D Mamas spine so fast it could turn the desert heat into Antartica.

"But you don't have your swimming suit"  (YEAH RIGHT!  Like that's going to work when she's playing with TWO other girls the same size!!!)

Think.  Think fast, Wendy.  THINK THINK THINK!!!!!!

"Okay.  Well....check your sugar first....and take off your pump..." (I figured losing the basal would be best for this scenario)

After a little chat with her mom (I hope I didn't sound nervous), she offered to set the kitchen timer and have Sugar test every 30 minutes.

God love that woman!

And that was that.

I proceeded to pretend everything was normal....you know....I'm just a normal mom with a normal kid who is enjoying a normal afternoon in a normal backyard pool with normal friends.  Yup.  It's all normal.

Normal.  Normal.  Normal.

This image kept flashing into my brain from yesterday...

TARGET BLOOD SUGAR 90 - 150

But, you know....it's all normal.

Ho Hum....HO HUM....HO HUM!!!!

The next 90 minutes went like this....

180
120
80 -- Phone call while I was getting ready to pick her up to let me know that she was eating her snack.

Ya know, I think this newfound friendship is going to work out quite nicely.

(And everyone had a great day at school, by the way!)

Blink. Tear. Drop.

Have you ever thought about the little things?

Take time, for example.  In one tiny second, so much can happen...

Childless to parenthood
Life to death
Rich to poor
Unemployed to employed
Single to married

When you REALLY think about it, all of life's major events come down to one single second. In the blink of an eye, so much can change.

Or what about tears?  Oh, those little drops can stir up so much emotion!!!!  The anguish you feel as a parent watching your child suffer.  They explain the emotions that you can't find words for.  Those little tears can tell a million stories.

Ya know, one eency weency drop of blood has the ability to make major decisions around here.  It decides if a site change is warranted, a juice box, or a bolus of insulin.  It can stop everything in it's tracks, alter plans, and change perception.  One drop can make the difference between staying or altering the course of life.

And then there's insulin.  Sugar's total daily dose is around 20 units.  Do you know what that looks like?

THAT'S IT!  When Sugar first began wearing her insulin pump, she was only getting about 6-7 units of insulin a day....roughly ONE-THIRD of that drop.

In one 24 hour period, about half of that tiny drop must be spread out to cover the glucose stores her body pumps into the blood stream.  Sugar's insulin pump administers a minuscule dose every 3 minutes.  EVERY THREE MINUTES -- around the clock....for 24 hours....FROM THAT LITTLE DROP!!!!!!!

The other half is used to cover the carbohydrates that she eats or drinks.  She can have a full meal PLUS a cupcake with a juice box, and it STILL hardly makes a dent in the drop.

If that entire drop was administered at once, it could kill her.  Withholding it could result in the same devastating outcome.

One little drop.

**MY** brain decides which hour of the day gets what portion of the drop.  I decide when to program the pump to give a smidgen more, when to back off, and when to keep things the same.  I decide at what times of day she'll need more of the drop to cover carbs and when she'll need less.  I decide how much of that drop will be used to correct a high blood sugar, decreased to accommodate physical activity, and increased to manage growth spurts and illnesses.

My brain knows she grows around 3 - 4 am.  The growth hormone is released during the pre-dawn hours and her insulin needs skyrocket.  For a few days, I'll be increasing the drop -- maybe even giving her plenty more than 20 units....and then, suddenly, it's too much.  I'll need to back down.  Way down.  Maybe even to a few units less.  After a few days of that, we'll gradually make it back to the NEW DROP.  After she grows, her insulin needs will increase permanently.  Perhaps by such a small amount, you can't even see it with the naked eye.

All the while, the pump is pumping every 3 minutes.

Yup.  Just one tiny drop.

Sometimes the little things in life make all the difference.

The Hard Truth About Our S and S Meatballs.

While on the stair-stepper-climber-thing (that I affectionately refer to as the ORANGE BEAST) yesterday, I was watching Paula Deen.  Paula and I are becoming good friends now that I'm on the orange beast at the same time every morning.  Anyway, she was making these sweet and sour meatballs....in my sweaty stupor, I decided that I had enough of the ingredients on hand and had to make them (almost) immediately.

Immediately meaning for tonight's dinner.  Because, sometimes, I feel like the best I can do to accommodate "immediately" in my world equates to about a 24 - 36 hour window after the fact.

First of all, I've never made meatballs before....let alone gluten free ones.  Paula used frozen ones, but 1) I've never seen frozen GF meatballs, 2) I like turkey and he likes beef, and 3)  We don't eat meatballs enough to keep a bag of frozen ones in the freezer.

So BEFORE I could get to Paula's yummy recipe I had to made these first. They were much easier than I expected, but it also meant I had to squeeze in the extra time to an already busy day.  Oh, well.

After all that effort, I was ready to make my sweet and sour sauce....the main ingredient being ketchup.....and.....we didn't have any.

Great.

Fortunately, my neighbor had a bottle she didn't need.

And this is when everything went downhill.

Sugar and her pal were in the middle of a playdate.  My neighbor's house isn't far...I figured they should be able to walk up the hill together without much fanfare.

About 10 minutes went by and my neighbor called to ask if they were on their way.

PANIC!!!!!!  I grabbed the other two - who were also in the middle of a playdate - threw everyone in the van and set off hollering their names out the window.  I figured my neighbor was outside looking for them on her end of the neighborhood, so I decided to navigate the other end.

I turned 2 corners without a single sighting.  When I rounded the third corner, I saw them. Just skipping along, having a grand old time.

I was furious.  I can't even begin to describe the rage in the pit of my stomach.  There was NO REASON for Sugar to take the long route.  When we venture to this neighbor's house, we NEVER go that way.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I gathered them up, thanked my neighbor for her ketchup and went home.  The playdate was over, Sugar was grounded, and I still had to finish dinner.

This is when Tiara dropped a ceramic plate while unloading the dishwasher.  Nice.

No ingredients.
Lost kids.
Shattered plate.

About 15 minutes after the lost child catastrophe, Sugar felt low....70....the insulin she got 90 minutes previous was now peaking....

Ya know, worrying that a stranger would snatch up your beautiful daughter right off her neighborhood street is a nightmare.

Worrying that your beautiful DIABETIC daughter would be snatched adds an entirely different element.

And then there's the fact that she was out there without her stuff....in the heat....walking uphill.

The WHAT IFS are endless.

ANYWAY, the meatballs are in the oven.  And they smell REALLY good.

What Better Place?

MOM     "Let's get your sugar checked so you can get in the pool."

SUGAR  "Oh yeah.  My pump has been buzzing for awhile."

MOM     "Really?  How long has that been going on?"

SUGAR  "Awhile."

(Um, thanks.  That helps.  Alot.)

I proceed to pull out her pump and find this....

And then I remembered that she was actually due for a site change the PREVIOUS day...or was it the day before that? ... At any rate, at some point, it looked like there was still enough insulin to make it another 24ish hours, so I let it go. 

The dang thing warned me when it was down to 10u, but that was in the middle of the night, and I didn't see the need to go through a site change at 2 am.

And then it was the next day, and....well, you know.

Oops.

We were at a swim party.  With food.  Lots and lots of incredible looking food, including some scrumptious GLUTEN FREE desserts prepared by our hostess.

 There was even a loaf of our FAVORITE brand of gluten free bread so Sugar and I could pile up a sandwich (from a gluten free deli tray -- man, Heidi totally ROCKED IT!). 

Ah, yes.  There was all this scrumptious food and WE DIDN'T HAVE ANY FREAKING INSULIN!!!!!!!  We had everything we needed for a site change....minus, of course, THE INSULIN!!!!!!!

Who needs that stuff, anyway?


Everyone at this swim party did.

(Multiple bags of diabetes supplies -- all hanging out on the countertop like old friends)

Mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters....yup....it was a room FULL of families living with type 1 diabetes!

Humalog?  Novalog?  What's your pleasure?  I can't describe the feeling of relief when we realized that this MAJOR catastrophe wasn't really major - or a catastrophe - after all.

Anway, after the insulin debacle, Sugar faced a pretty ugly low while swimming.  Another mom -- a mom she had never even met before -- was in the water and recognized right away that something was wrong.  Imagine that?!?!  A complete stranger grabbed her and helped her out of the water.  Of course we didn't have the test kit outside with us.  I mean....why, pray tell, would we do a thing like that??  We've only been at this for FIVE YEARS...besides, if you're going to show up without insulin, why bother dealing with any of it????  (I'm being sarcastic, by the way.)

I got THE LOOK.  The look that shoots straight through my heart, bypassing any rational thinking, and soars like a cannon to the area of my brain that KNOWS this is a bad one.  I didn't need a meter for that.  And guess what?  While Mr. Rose was off retrieving our bag o' supplies, a juice box appeared out of nowhere from, yet another, new family we had never met before.

So....just to be clear....over the course of 2 hours....

1)  We snagged 50u of Novolog off a complete stranger.
2)  A mother with no previous knowledge of Sugar rescued her from a horrible low while swimming.
3)   Someone else we had never met before had a juice box ready and waiting.


The evening was spectacular.  All those families gathered together....testing, testing, everywhere.  It was awesome to hang out with Heidi (from D-Tales) and Sweet Momma (from Sugar Kids).  I had a great time meeting a few new families too!

It was truly the BEST possible way we could have spent the last weekend of summer vacation...well, minus the lack of insulin and that nasty low blood sugar....

And They're Off!

Well, I guess that's it.

My baby days are officially over.

Today both Tink and Tiara started preschool...together!

This is the third year, we have placed our girls in this program.  Aside from some hiccups in the beginning of Sugar's preschool year (specifically related to her diabetes management....enter 504!), we have been overwhelmingly pleased with the learning experiences our children have had.

Last year the program hosted an AM class for 3 year olds and a PM class for 4 year olds.  I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised when the district opted to change that format; and, instead, combine both age groups into one AM class and one PM class.  This meant, I would be able to put both girls into the same class, and....well....HAVE THREE HOURS TO MYSELF EVERY. SINGLE. DAY!!!!!!!  (Well, Monday thru Thursday, anyway!)

Not to mention that I'll be picking everyone up at the same time (from the SAME school!!!!)....AND....the preschool class starts around the same time that Sugar's lunch time begins....so....conveniently, I'll be on campus if any blood sugar issues arise.  As if all that wasn't enough, God has provided funding so that both girls are able to attend preschool this year.  Even during this difficult economy, the 60% depreciation of our home value, a significant salary reduction, and mandatory furlough days.....we are BEYOND blessed.....GOD IS GOOD!!!!!

Now, don't get me wrong.  I LOVE my girls dearly, but, last year, I was hardly able to volunteer at all because of my work schedule and the fact that I had someone with me at all times.  (It's district policy that siblings cannot accompany a volunteer during school activities.)  I'm thrilled to have the opportunity to go into both the preschool and 1st grade classrooms to assist and observe this year.  THRILLED!!!

I'm equally excited that there are only 9 children in their preschool class.....and everyone, except Tink, is a 4 year old.  For this reason, the teacher has decided to offer a 4 year old curriculum to the entire class, as opposed to working through two curriculums to accommodate age groups.  Aside from the obvious reasons for being pleased with the small class size, I'm very excited that Tink will have this unique opportunity to progress.

You see, Tink is the baby in our family.  While she does just fine playing with children her age or younger, the fact remains that she learns best from her older sisters....and her sisters have taught her quite a bit!  Tink knows how to share. She knows how to wait her turn in line.  She knows how to problem solve when an issue comes up while playing with another child.  She never has potty accidents, is quick to offer a solution when issues arise, and takes turns easily.  Tink is ready for this curriculum!  Should she encounter concepts that are difficult for her, the teacher will tailor those lessons specifically to better meet her developmental needs.  As a result, Tink will have an extremely individualized learning experience this year...did I mention that GOD IS GOOD??????

ANYWAY, in true Tiara style, she insisted on wearing a fancy dress.  Nevermind that it's three sizes too big. Or that she'd be climbing a play structure, making play dough, and digging in the sand.  No, none of that matters.  Tiara likes pretty dresses, and I've learned to just go with it.  Whatever.  Pick my battles, right?

Tink, on the other hand, found a Dora skirt in a hand-me-down bag that's been waiting for my attention.  As soon as she saw it, she put it on and refused to take it off.  Fine with me!  Just be happy and enjoy your VERY first day of school, my sweet baby girl :)

OH, and one more thing....

Mr. Rose was furloughed today.....so.....we went on a lunch date :)  I have an entire post planned for that experience...so stay tuned!  

Yes, my friends.  It's going to be a great school year for all of my girls!  Sugar, by the way, has had a DYNAMITE start.  After one full week, she's only had ONE blood sugar over 200 and not one single low.  She even earned the first trip to the treasure chest for good behavior!

I'm feeling overwhelmed with blessings today.  Despite Mr. Rose's furlough today, sending diabetes to school, and missing a slice of deep dish pizza, we are blessed!!!!!!

The Superhero Post

Excuse me while I dab the corner of my eye.

A few days ago, I got a comment from someone who works at our local JDRF Chapter.  I wanted to check out her blog right away, but time got away from me, and I just didn't have a chance.

That is, until this evening....  

Working For Superheros

Old School

All this back to school chatter has caused me to pause and reflect at how far we've come.  Today I decided to go back....WAY BACK....to the first blog post I wrote when I began blogging 2 years ago.  I dug this out of my archives and decided to repost it today.


I read this and realize that so much has changed....yet nothing has changed at the same time.  The day I wrote this, I wasn't connected to the diabetes online community (DOC).  Today you guys are like family.  I feel incredibly blessed to have found all of you.


I hope you'll join me for a short stroll down memory lane....

Round 2

Well, here I am...again...

I tried to start a blog 16 months ago, right after the birth of my last baby in May 2007. That lasted, um, about 2 months...during which time, I think I managed to post all of 3 times.

You might say I was a little busy. I was balancing life with a nursing newborn AND a nursing toddler (**gasp**, I know, YES I was nursing TWO babies -- now that the shock has worn off, I'll continue...), and diabetic 3 year old -- with only my wonderful husband (who also happens to be gone 12+ hours a day) to help. Yup. I was busy.

Funny thing is...I still am. Somehow the days have passed, my little girls are getting bigger...and I'm getting busier. I'm still nursing that baby I mentioned before. Her name is Tink, by the way. Her older sister, Tiara, finally weaned after I forced her into it at the age of 2 1/2 years. They're both very curious toddlers -- into anything and making a mess of everything. Big sister,Sugar, is teaching them well how to leave a tornado in their tracks. I wouldn't change this life for the world. Now, ask me if I felt that way about 3 hours ago while I was making dinner and you'd probably get a different answer. But, at this moment in time, everyone is tucked sweetly into bed...and I'm not far behind. So, at this moment, I couldn't imagine my life any other way.

Ah...daydreaming...

THAT MOMENT IS OVER.

Then there's that pesky little thing called Type 1 Diabetes. You'll hear a lot about that subject here. Can't help it. My life revolves around Sugar's blood sugar. Among everything else in life, it determines how much sleep I'll get at night, when I'll wake up, when I'll eat, what I'll be thinking about at any given moment, how I'll plan family outings, and how far from the school I'll stray. Yeah, it's safe to say that our life revolves around Sugar's blood sugar.

(Hey, don't judge us until you've lived with, and raised, a child with this disease. I'm about sick of hearing people tell me that "I can't let diabetes win"...blah, blah, blah. So, let's get one thing very clear. Diabetes hasn't "won" anything.  Sugar is healthy, well adjusted, and happy. But, do not be mistaken.  It takes an exhausting amount of work to achieve that...or should I say EXHAUSTING amounts of brainpower...just to keep her alive.)

Numbers. Right now she's asleep at 229 with 0.10u IOB and 22 minutes so I gave her a 0.30 correction and will check her again in 2 hours. Make sense? Good. There's more.

Basal rates, ratios, insulin sensitivity/correction factors, boluses, sites, IOB, disconnect, carbs, target range, low, high, ketones, balance, shots, Lantus,Novolog, pump, TDD, averages, A1c...

I am fluent in a second language. It's called Type 1 Diabetes. And I hope you never have to learn it this well.

If I sound tense, it's because Sugar just started kindergarten. Let's just take the last few points of this post and sum it up to say that it's pretty stressful sending diabetes to school.

Maybe I'll feel better after another night of interrupted sleep and spur of the moment troubleshooting for wacky blood sugars. Because, aside from a handful of nights, I haven't slept more than a 3 hour stretch in, at least, the past 3 years.

I'm tired, but I don't have a choice except to feel better.

Because I'm the mom.

Called In Sick

haircut.  quiet lunch.  toes.  

Thank you, Mr. Rose.

I had a great day off!

(PS -- In case you're wondering....I'm STILL angry with that (unnamed) company for discontinuing their gluten free Orange Valencia Cake...tsk tsk....shame on you UNNAMED COMPANY! )