Waves

Heather's post yesterday totally reminded me of one I wrote last year....and then Hallie's week totally sealed the deal....

Shhhhh.

Do you hear the calm sea? Gentle waves on the shoreline washing over shiny seashells. It's a nice place to be.

Oh wait. I hear something in the distance. The sky looks dark out there...a storm. A raging storm closing in.

I knew the storm was coming, but I spent a week making excuses trying to avoid it.

Like always, it started with a subtle high number. Randomly 300. Hmmmm...

Is it time to change her site? When did we open that vial of insulin? I must have miscounted her carbs. Christmas excitement, perhaps? Might be a little bug coming on.

And then they came tumbling in. Scattered highs that have no rhyme or reason. There they are, all over the place. Her 7 day average is 200....eeewwww...it's really happening.

The storm has arrived.

Again.

Where to start? Basals? Ratios? Correction factors?

A few weeks of calm seas. She's a growing child -- of course it wasn't going to last forever. Her insulin needs skyrocket when she's growing.

Except I'm just an ordinary mom. I just have an ordinary brain. I don't inherently know what time of day she needs more insulin...or how much she will need. And so the thinking begins.

My brain spins circles trying to get her numbers back on track. Who knows how long this will last? I can't see if we're making progress until tomorrow. Or the next day. Or the next...

One wave at a time.

I hope I don't get seasick.